Opportunities to Do Good

(Kala was painting a poster for Aunt Melissa and Baby Ryker to come home from the hospital, he had sooo much fun to say the least!)

This past Sunday I was given the opportunity to speak at church. I was not given a topic, but was asked to pray about what I should speak on. Right off the bat, I thought of the talk, "What Manner of Men and Women Ought Ye to be?" by Elder Lynn G. Robbins, because I had been so touched by it in the last general conference. It truly moved me to action. I decided after that talk that I wanted to do the things that we therefore move me forward to the person that I so desire to be. I decided that I would work on responding to the small everyday promptings I receive from the Lord, particularly those that concerned service to others, even if it was just a phone call or a note. Truly it has changed my life. As this opportunity to speak came up I felt that others too may benefit from the experiences that I have had since last april. Well I got in the car the next morning to go to the market and my husband had a byu-speech podcast playing called "Why Giving Matters". Talk about incredible! If you ever had an excuse of why you couldn't give, this sure PROVES (literally with statistics) why we can and should serve. It's incredible the impact service has on the lives of others as well as our own and watching THIS short video (4 mins) this evening just reiterated that to me. I am so very grateful to be part of a church that stresses to its members the importance of service. I truly hope that I can truly "be" a service oriented person and that the Lord can count on me when he needs something to be done. I have been lucky enough to have the opportunity to serve my sweet sister this week in Tuscon as she recovers. I don't think helping with the cutest little newborn really counts as service but I am thankful for each and every opportunity that the Lord gives me to help others, even if they may be small and insignificant to me, who knows, maybe one day it will seem much more to someone on the other end...

slow dance

I was thinkin about an old friend today, lookin at old notes I had written. I had written these song lyrics one day

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a
butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly? When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say,"Hi"
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.
When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.

Its funny to sit here now looking at silly letters to old friends when I was in high school. I can't even remember if these were lyrics to a song, a poem i read, or maybe even an email who knows. But it's so funny that I had written this but failed to take my own advice and slow down. And for that same reason I lost this dear relationship. It always seems that I'm in a rush to get somewhere. I think it's about time to take my own advice and slow down a bit. The world isn't going anywhere, but my life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes. I wish i could take all these years back and really be the kind of friend that I realize I could have been. I wish I could have been there for the people that matter most. It's funny the older I get the more I learn and the more I realize I didn't know, and the more I realize I could have done. It tears me up inside knowing now how much more of a person I could be now if I would have known then what I know now. Sometimes I feel like I'm talking in circles and it all makes sense to me but I'm not quite sure if it's coming out right. I guess it's just... weird to look back and realize all you thought you knew but you didn't know and if you would just slow down maybe you'd know. But then how do you move forward when one day you'll be looking back and wish you would have known better?

some...days

Some days I feel like we're never going to make it to the next step or we're never going to make it out! Life isn't quite the walk on the beach that the movies portray. Now I'm not venting because today was definitely not one of those days. I had a visit from my new relief society presidency this evening and one of the sisters was telling me about her husband and her story and i was like OH MY GOODNESS DE JA VU! THAT'S US! WE'RE ONLY A FEW YEARS BEHIND! haha I just want to say how grateful I am for the sisters in relief society. For the love and support they have for each other. I am so grateful to be a part of such a beautiful organization and for the tender mercies of the Lord. It feels so good when he sends another sister your way that has been through the same experiences. And even though i know he is always here for me, it feels good to know that others have been through the same thing, they know how you feel, and that THEY MADE IT OUT! haha. In doctrine and Covenants 122 verse 7 it says, "And if thou shouldst be cast into the pit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the deep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to hedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of hell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good." I know that sometimes trials seem tough, and that maybe we'll never make it out, but I know that all these things are for my good, and I am just so grateful for the love and support that i have all around to help me through the hard and good times.

practicing to be perfect

Yesterday evening after dinner at my aunt and uncles house, we got to have family home evening with them. We talked about Christ's atonement for us and what he died for. He didn't just die for one or two of my mistakes, not even just 95% of my mistakes, he died for %100 of my pain and suffering, for %100 of my mistakes. He doesn't require us to be perfect in return, he requires that we try our very hardest. So in a sense we are "practicing to be perfect". I know it's not going to happen over night, and the Lord knows I sure wish it could. Some times, particularly as an LDS woman, we feel as if perfection is required. But it's not, and we have to remember that. It's been kind of strange for me the past few years as I have made new friends and gained new family, how many people have categorized me as a "molly mormon" persay. It's funny, because the "molly mormon" to me is perfect, and I am far from perfection. Sometimes I feel defensive about it, because there's so much more to me. But as I was pondering this "practicing to be perfect" concept, I realized it's just fine, because I am seeking to reach perfection. When I return to my heavenly father one day, I want to be able to say that I sought to make changes in my life to become as he would have me be. I looked at my two tired boys on sunday when we got home, and I am grateful for this opportunity to be able to try, try and try again because my Heavenly Father knows I'm not perfect, but I am practicing.

one of the big kids

on sunday we went to my uncle steven and aunt michelle's house for dinner! my cousin andrew had this little game thing that you pulled the object out to make these toys spin (they were kind of like tops) and then they bump into each other and the person top that lasts the longest wins of something i don't know. haha. anyway. kala thought he wanted to play too. and since everyone was "throwing" their toys in, he decided he would throw in his pacifier. haha. it was so funny. he though he was one of the big kids. i love that boy.

Hawaiian Keiki

Turns out, Kala LOVES spam. He ate almost a whole slice of spam with rice! I am not sure if I mentioned, but he tends to only snack throughout the day because he CANNOT STAND staying still for very long. But not with his baked spam, he sat until he only had two little pieces left before he told me he was all done! He is officially a true hawaiian keiki!

the way I live

So my husband has had a passing saying throughout the summer. "Live like no one else so that you can live like no one else" from Dave Ramsy, the guy that everyone is obsessed with about getting themselves out of debt and everything. But today I was thinking of that saying, just a bit differently. As a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, often times I am asked, or told in a sense that my church restricts me so I can't live freely. But truthfully, I don't feel that way at all. For one, I have the free agency to choose to live those things, and secondly, I WANT to "live like no one else so that I can live like no one else". In living this way, I am not tied down by addictions, nor do they tear apart my family. Each day is a challenge placed with so many blessings as I follow the commandments that the Lord has given me. As I follow the Lords teachings, I get to experience the greatest freedom anyone could feel. Each morning when I wake up, I have a choice to make, how am I going to live my day. Some days I just want to lay in bed and watch movies all day. But those are always the days I feel the crumiest at the end. When I choose to be proactive, play fun games with my sweet little boy, even clean up after myself immediately, I feel incredible, motivated, satisfied. I want to live like no one else so that I can live like no one else. I am not quite sure if I am making any sense... but here it is!